Just like there are moments of time that change your life, there are also people. Everyone knows that the lighthouse is there to guide ships safely into the harbor. What many don’t know is that this idea can be applied to people as well.
Everyone has a lighthouse in their life. These lighthouses are people who guide us through the storms of life and provide a light for us to follow out of the darkness. They show you how to negotiate the “rocks” and navigate through the fog and severe storms that come along in your life. Without them, we would almost certainly crash on the rocks.
I know I would have.
I have had several lighthouses in my life. Without these incredible people, I wouldn’t be here with you today and would have crashed on the rocks long ago. I could go on and on about these people and what they have done for me, but it’s the story of one lighthouse in particular that I would like to share with you now.
It was a dark and stormy night in New York City sometime in the late 1960’s. The wind was roaring around the street corners and the rain was pouring down onto the sidewalk in sheets. On this particular night, my elderly great grandmother was trying to get home from the grocery store. She was attempting to walk down Park Avenue and had her cane in one hand and her little bag of groceries in the other. Walking was hard for her on a good day, so a rainy and windy one made it almost impossible. When she was about halfway home, a long black stretch limousine pulled up to the curb and stopped next to her. The door opened and a woman got out of the car. Ignoring the rain that soon soaked her through, she walked right up to my great grandmother and gently asked her if she could give her a ride home. Shortly after, my great grandmother was settled comfortably into one of the seats and was driven home.
The woman?
Carol Burnett.
As a child, I used to listen to my parents tell this story and I can distinctly remember deciding to become just like Carol Burnett when I grew up. The money and fame aspect of her life meant nothing to me … it was her other traits that I aspired to. The love and genuine compassion that she showed to my great grandmother that night was the person that I wanted to be. I wanted to be funny and loving. I wanted to help people and be warm and honest. Ms. Burnett was my lighthouse, and her bright light guided me through my youth. As I navigated through the many rocks and storms that came up during my life, I kept my eye on her and always knew that I would make it through. I knew that I could become a good person like she did if I just kept my eye on her light and trusted my intuition.
She became my north star, and she guided me safely into my twenties.
Many years later, when I was about 8 months pregnant with my first son, I finally found the chance to pass it forward. I was headed to the grocery store when I saw this little old lady pushing a cart filled with groceries. She had twisted and thin little legs and seemed to struggle with each step. So I pulled my car over to the side of the road and got out with the intention of helping the woman home. As I walked up to her, I offered my help and guess what happened?
She hit me on the head with her umbrella and screamed “I can do it myself!”
Ah well … I suspect my lighthouse will see the humor in this! I laughed until tears came to my eyes and got back into my car and drove home. It was certainly a nice first try!
Now that I’m all grown up, I like to believe that I did indeed become that person … warm, loving, honest and compassionate all combined with a good sense of humor. I have indeed passed it forward many times since those days long ago, and I hope to continue to do so in the future … although I do hope that I don’t get hit on the head again with an umbrella!
My lighthouse gave me a positive direction to walk when I could have so easily taken the wrong path. My childhood and teenage years were dark ones filled with a dysfunction, fear and anger. My lighthouse showed me where to walk during the storms that followed over the years, and she made me laugh when I needed some extra light. I watched as she went through her own trials and tribulations with dignity, love, grace and incredible courage. I have tried to do the same when my own trials came across my path. I could have walked in all sorts of directions in those early formative years, but her light showed me the way. As time went on, several more lighthouses appeared to guide me through and I have finally made it safely to the harbor.
Now let’s talk about each one of you. Who were the lighthouses of your life? How did they help you get across the ocean? Each one of us has had a lighthouse to guide us through life, and I think it’s important to look back and see them so that we can give them our thanks and our love.
Today, I like to think that I’m a lighthouse. My life’s work is to guide people safely to their harbors so that they can live a life of peace, love and prosperity. I think everyone should be a lighthouse for someone because the light that you share could change their life forever.
Update: Did Carol Burnett ever hear about this story? Yes she did. I put this article into a chapter of my book “Rainbows and Banana Peels” and she wrote me a lovely note that I have framed in my office.
